Memories That Never Happened

What the word "dream" means is entirely up to you. Some people will say it's an alternate reality. Some will say it's the true reality. Others might look at dreams as a way to see what's going to happen in their lives.

Ask a scientist what a dream is. They'll most likely tell you this definition: "A series of thoughts, images, and sensations occurring in a person's mind during sleep."

Why? Because that's the "correct" definition of a dream. While most of that is true, I believe there's something missing. My definition is quite simple. "A memory that never happened". Simple, right? Well, some may not see it as I do. And that's fine, it's their right and choice not to.

But let me enlighten you as to how I personally view dreams and the effects they can cause.

I believe the simple definition that dreams are just thoughts. Not premonitions or an alternate reality. Very simplisticly real thoughts. Thoughts that may be constantly on your mind, or even in the back of it that your subconcious holds onto. The ones that you may not have time to think about during the day with all of your activities taking place around you. Work, school, hobbies or even a crisis. They're light when you think about them at first, because you don't have the time, or maybe even mental energy, to go deeper into them. So we look at it as a "condensed thought". Simply a generalized view of what's ailing you or perhaps what's making you feel like a kid in a candy store again. Example? "What if he/she still loves me?" That's a very common thought, and often very generalized due to the lack of time/energy we as thriving humans have to put forth into it. You don't have time to really dwell on that...to really sink in.

At night though...that's where the circumstances change. It becomes heavier. At night, you see it in a more clear way because your mind has time to pick at it. To analyze it. Most likely because you've got time to yourself now. Perhaps you think about it right before you fall asleep. Maybe you have a bed to yourself, or the person who shares it with you has already drifted off to sleep...leaving you there to wade into your own pool of scenarios and emotions.

And that's where the dream begins to kindle. Your body slows down but your mind is still racing. So now, those thoughts that were in your subconcious all day? They're free to swim amongst the stars. You see what you think. You feel it. Physically and emotionally. Sometimes, my emotions are stronger in my dreams. A thought that may have saddened me during the day could make me cry in my dreams. Why? Because I'm experiencing it. It's not just a thought anymore. It becomes so real in our minds that we actually convince ourselves that it is. We live in it, if only for the night. I believe dreams are more powerful than any thought we could ever concieve. Because once it becomes a dream, it becomes almost completely real. We can feel it as if we were truly there. As if it might as well have happened.

All it takes is one dream. One dream...to stir up our deepest emotions and leave us haunted by a memory that never happened.

Just...go for it.

Recently, I had a talk with a good friend of mine. This friend was asking for advice of the relationship variety. He told me that he really liked this girl, in a way that he's never felt. He spoke of how she likes him, too. Which made me question why he needed my advice if he already knows how they both feel about each other. Sounds like a pretty easy answer, right?

WRONG. You lose. Go put your face on a waffle iron. Wait, no, don't do that. You'll have horrible scars and people will throw syrup on you for the rest of your life. You'll smell good, but the wrong kind of people might want to lick you...

Anyways. The problem he faced which caused him to call me was this: it sounds too good to be true.
Now, I'm sure we've all been here. Our life takes a turn for the better, and it just seems like nothing can go wrong. You feel invincible and unbelievably happy. But after a while, that though creeps into the back of your head. That annoying little voice whose soul purpose is to take all of the hope and happy out of your life like a Dementor suckfest. It tells you those words that just make you question everything in your life, including what you ate for breakfast. Don't worry, Toaster Strudel's are never a bad idea. Stop crying.

After explaining how he felt, my friend asked me what I thought. And basically, when someone asks you for advice with something like that, they're asking you for a push in either direction. Or they've already made up their mind, and they're just looking for approval. Either way, DON'T ANSWER THEM. Don't give them your answer. Just tell them this: "Do whatever feels better to you".

Now put yourself in their position. Or maybe you already are. Whichever position you're in, think of it like this. You only live once, and you'll never know what it could've been like unless you go for it. Worse case scenario? It doesn't work out and you don't even stay friends. And yes, I know that sounds horrible. But hey. You're strong. You'll move on. You could experience that kind of feeling again. You never know. And even if you don't? Hey, you experienced it nonetheless. And you can hold your head high, saying, "yeah. That was me. I went for it. I know what it could've been, because I went for it". So do it. Go. Ask that guy/girl out. Take that new career turn. Order salad instead of that soup! You got this! YES.

...no really. Go for it.

An Outlet

You woke up late. You spilled your coffee. The car won't start. Traffic is making you bite your steering wheel, and it isn't even flavored. Maybe you got into a fight with your woman. Or man. Or family. Or that automatic door that decided to stay shut and make you look like even technology hates you right now. Any of these ever happen to you?

If they haven't, then you're clearly not human. Which means if you're reading this, you've learned yourself into the English way of reading, writing and most likely speaking. In which case, hello friendly nature critter and/or alien space dweller.

W've all had those days where we just want to throw a drink coaster at our cousin Ingrid, but doing such a thing wouldn't be advised as it's still regrettably illegal (one day, Ingrid...). So, we're forced to hold in our frustration and take it out on the stapler at work. And if you don't have a stapler, you're probably reading this from your jail cell for what you did to your cousin. Don't do that.


OR. We can find an outlet. And no, I don't mean taking out your troubles on the wall socket. Put the fork down, that's a horrible idea. What I mean is some kind of emotional or physical release. One that won't get you in trouble with the law or your meth-addicted-soap-eating neighbor. Though, he does have REALLY clean teeth. Way to go, Dove For Men.

Example time: When I get frustrated, upset, sad or even lonely...I sing. Or I exercise. Or I shoot things (at a shooting range, not in my living room). Sometimes, I just drive around to clear my head or gather my thoughts. All of which work for ME, but may not necessarily work for you. The problem that most of us have is that we take out our emotions (good or bad) on the first thing we feel deserves it. Or even sometimes on a thing that don't deserve it at all, but we tell ourselves that it does so we don't think ill of ourselves later. I swear, stop signs are so self-righteous...

Serious-face time: Don't lash out against something or someone just because you're emotionally overloaded and you THINK it/they deserve it. Maybe some guy cut you off, and you honk violently at him and flip him off. Just take a second to consider...maybe he's on his way to the hospital because a friend or loved one was in an accident. Or even when someone doesn't say thank you after you hold the door open for them, there could always be something you don't see. Perhaps they're lost in their own thoughts and emotions because they got fired, or maybe life took a bad turn and their house was robbed. The point is, someone else could be having a bad day and accidently made you upset, which caused you to lash out against them when perhaps they didn't deserve it. Hell, even if they did it purposely, don't take it out on them because it'll get you nowhere. Instead, just find your own outlet. Wish them well, and keep moving along. Then later, if you're still upset, do whatever it is you do to let it all go. Get it out of your system in a way that doesn't focus towards developing negative feelings towards another soul. Stand on a bridge and scream if it helps, but don't be negative towards someone else when they don't deserve it. You never know what they're going through, either. Open your eyes and see all of the colors, not just the ones you want to see.

Let Me Explain.

What do I mean by "to have colorful eyes"? Remember. This blog is all just my opinion. I don't pretend that what I say is fact. What I say could be completely different from how you feel. I don't want to change your mind. I don't want the world to think as I do. Everyone is different. And that's part of the point of this blog. The way I see it, the world isn't just black and white. I don't see things as "it's either this way or it's not". There's an infinite amount of ways something can play out. There's few facts, and a multitude of opinions. As it should be. No one should be forced to go against their beliefs and opinions, as no one should be doing the forcing. We're all different in every way. I try to look at something as unobjectively as possible. Something in my life takes place, and I can't always figure out why or what the purpose is. I just accept that it's happened, and hope that one day I may understand it. Just because I don't understand it at the time, doesn't mean I should run from it or push it away. I try to be as open as I can. I don't fight it. I see all of its colors. Not just the black and white. So when something happens to you, maybe that could help you deal with it or understand. But again, follow your own thoughts. Your own heart. Don't falter from the path you've set out to travel, but try to remember that everything and everyone will be different than you. If someone doesn't feel the same as you do about something, don't hold it against them. Try to remember that they have their own reasons,different from yours, as to why that's their opinion. They see it in a different color. So please, try to understand their hue, but keep your own colors bright. That's what it means to have colorful eyes. - Posted using BlogPress from a really intelligent rectangle.

The Start.

I've never had a blog before. For some reason, I've never been THAT comfortable telling my life story to complete strangers. But these days, we don't have reason to be strangers with others. So let me tell you a little about me and a little about this.

My name is David. I'm a husband, a father and a strong believer of love and effort. I haven't really ever tried to do something different or put much effort into anything. That is, until I met my wife and was given a baby boy of my own. Now, they're my something different. They're my something that I will put all my efforts into.
But the road to where I'm going isn't over. It has hardly even begun. 20 years isn't long enough to even consider being close to becoming what you hope to be. I've struggled in life. I've had my hardships, and I've had moments that left me in an unability to recognize myself. I've also been happier than I've ever imagined, and that's not something you want to only experience once.

I can't explain who I exactly am as a person, but I can let you get a good idea. Because even I don't know who exactly I am. And that's the fun of life; discovering who you are.

Will this blog be an amazing work of art? No. Am I doing this to become popular? No. I'm doing this mostly for me. And that's the point of a blog, a diary, a video log or even a hobby. Maybe that's what this is for almost everyone on here. A hobby. Something that's only theirs. Their escape. Their alternate reality. Whatever works for you, because it's for YOU. Do I hope that maybe this blog helps someone along the way? Yes. I hope to help anyone, anytime I can. Why? Because I want to Open My Eyes. I don't want to shut myself away from anything, or anyone. I want to live, as much as I can.

So what will these posts be like? Maybe my feelings. My stories. Something interesting that happened. Good advice. A shoulder to lean on. Words of wisdom. An epiphany. Hell, maybe I'll post a video here and there of something. I sing, so I'd like to maybe do something with that. This is my story, my journey. I want to share it with anyone that wants to keep up or come along. But no matter what I do on here, I don't wish to do it alone. I'd like to get to know everyone who reads this, be friends, talk. I have my funny moments, and my serious ones. So let's see where this goes.